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by  |  16-May-2015 23:20

Most of us start to wake up from this fog in our 40s and realize what bunk it is (some women don’t catch on until they reach their 50s).

I put myself last in our relationship and catered to that man.

(And what a waste of my time, effort, and money that ever was.) As a result, I never got my needs met in that relationship. ” He said, “Yeah, I’m here.” It dawned on me he was angry, but I could not figure out . I don’t remember his exact words, but the summation of it is that he felt that my “congratulations, babe, that is great news! He was expecting me to hire a marching band on his behalf, a plane with one of those banners behind it that says “You Da Man” to fly over the city, and to do cart wheels in his honor. (I can’t remember if I explained this to my ex Fred, but I think I did.) The family I grew up in was NOT supportive or encouraging.

So here was my jackass ex fiance, Fred, expecting me to give him something I never got in my own family.

I thought that when I had said to him in a sincere, cheerful tone, “Hey, congratulations, I am so proud of you, great job,” when he told me about his accomplishments, that I was being pretty good and thoughtful, considering the cruddy, negative family I came from.

I go into a bit more detail below (via a personal example), but suffice it to say, from the time we are little girls, the vast majority of us ladies are taught to put ourselves last and to cater to men.

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