The anxious types find that their perception of wanting more intimacy than their partner can provide is confirmed, as is their anticipation of ultimately being let down by significant others.
For both men and women, emotional availability determines the potential strength of commitment, which is insurance against desertion or infidelity. “[Avoidant and anxious] attachment styles complement each other.
Each reaffirms the other’s beliefs about themselves and about relationships.
Levine and Heller also warn about most dating advice:“Common dating advice is usually to play hard to get – this attracts avoidants because you ignore your needs and let the other person determine the amounts of closeness or distance in the relationship.
By being someone you’re not, you’re allowing another to be with you on his or her own terms and come and go as he pleases.“If you’re sensitive and nurturing enough to calm their fears – which is very doable – you will win a greatly loving and devoted partner.
I really hope this isn't another high school chick, BPC.